The Story Behind Embrace & Flow
My journey to alignment and connection.
TL;DR:
I spent a lot of time being told by others how I should be, what I should do, and what success looked like. Turns out none of this was true to me and led me down a path that felt very disconnected from who I really am.
Since 2024, I’ve broken away from the people who want to tell me who I am and have been on a dedicated journey to figuring that out for myself. The work I’ve done has been so instrumental to my happiness and enjoyment of life that I can’t imagine not helping others find the same.
The Beginning
I grew up in an emotionally distant family. To get the attention I felt I lacked at home, I acted out at school, didn’t know some thoughts are meant to stay “inside thoughts”, and generally had a difficult time making friends.
Looking back at my childhood and most of high school, there aren’t many happy memories that come to mind. Mostly, it’s a sense of loneliness and feeling disconnected from my peers.
My father — an Englishman and University of Oxford graduate — taught me from a very young age that I’d only done well if I impressed him; he was intensely loving but didn’t always know how to show it in a way that resonated. He struggled with Type 2 diabetes that he did not manage well, severe depression and anxiety, and his own misconceptions about external validation. He committed suicide when I was 18.
My mother — a licensed medical doctor — was very sick when I was little, which we’ve since learned was caused by a form of PTSD that manifested as intense chemical sensitivity, in addition to chronic illness. She has spent the last two decades using her medical background to support a shift to the holistic world, helping heal my brother and me from our own chronic illnesses, and dedicating herself to breaking generational trauma cycles. As a result, our now family of three has grown closer, healthier, and remarkably strong in communication since my dad’s death.
My parents have very much shaped who I am, and for good and bad, I would not be where I am today without their influence.
Returning to Myself
It’s taken me a long time to get to a feeling of “I belong.” In fact, I don’t think I truly felt comfortable as myself until I was 25.
Growing up, I was constantly looking for external validation, wanting to be liked, wanting to stand out. From early high school through post-college, I was consistently in a relationship because having a boyfriend meant having constant proof that, for someone, I was enough. Still, I never actually felt like enough, and really struggled with confidence in myself and what I was doing.
College was easier than high school in terms of feeling like I fit in. Peers become more diverse, there’s more opportunity to pursue unique interests rather than a set curriculum, and new independence that comes with leaving home for the first time. But it was still full of its own ups and downs: I joined a sorority, was sorely disappointed in the misleading marketing of “sisterhood”; was booted off campus and had everything disrupted junior year because of COVID; and in senior year, I started dating the guy who was the catalyst to my spiritual journey.
When I graduated, he convinced me to follow him to Hoboken, NJ, because he was moving there for the job he’d gotten in Brooklyn. Was he going to live with me? No. Was I on my own to figure out my own job, living situation, and move? Yes. Did I do it all anyway because I was scared of what would happen if I broke up with him and didn’t go? You betcha.
This relationship lasted a total of 3.5 years, during which I ignored many red flags, regularly felt like I was not actually loved and accepted for who I really was, was told that I needed to change many things about myself — my conversation skills, my tattoos, my religion — to be good enough for him, and felt like I was constantly fighting for my right to just exist.
At the end of it all, I reached a point where I finally understood that continuing to be in a relationship with someone for whom I was never, ever enough, was truly killing my soul. If I wasn’t able to freely and fully express myself, who was I supposed to be?
Luckily, in 2022, I ventured into the world of Divine Navigation and became the youngest person to ever have my Coordinates identified. I truly believe that learning my Divine Coordinates was what helped me finally recognize how toxic this relationship was.
In late 2023, I started my yoga teacher training, and it felt like the first time in my life that I was surrounded by like-minded people who genuinely understood me. It continued to unlock something in me.
In February 2024, I knew I could no longer stay in that relationship — or in Hoboken — without completely giving up myself.
Leaving was not easy. I spent many weeks grieving the identity and version of myself I was leaving behind, while also sitting with the fear of not knowing what would come next. Yet, as things tend to do when you begin acting from alignment, everything started to fall into place. I was offered the opportunity to begin my certification as a Divine Navigation coach; I was working at the yoga studio after finishing my teacher training; and I was setting my next move into motion.
In September 2024, I moved to Pittsburgh, PA, on my own. Of all the cities my corporate job had offices in that I could transfer to, there was something about this one that just seemed to be pulling me in.
Since then, I have made lasting connections, genuine friends, and met the love of my life, all because I started with authenticity and alignment. I bought my first home, where I live with my partner and our little barn cat, and I finally feel like I’m in a place I belong, surrounded by people who love me for who I am.